The fact is…I’m terrified.

Courage is not the absence of fear, but the act of doing something regardless of the fear. Courage is taking a step. Courage is walking into that arena, knowing you’re going to get your @$$ kicked, but doing it anyway. Courage for me is having a conversation. Courage is making something and showing it to someone else. Being seen. I mean really seen.

I’ve entered into this new year with a new depth of understanding. I have an understanding that I struggle with fear. Being afraid of everything. I am afraid to connect. I am afraid to be seen. I am afraid that what I say doesn’t matter. I am afraid that I will be an insignificant blip in this shifting sand of history and humanity. Then I am even more afraid that when I get over my fear of being insignificant and create something, someone will see my nakedness and laugh at me. I am afraid of everything.

And up until recently, I have unwittingly allowed those fears to control me. Those fears were the facts in my life. Fact: I am not perfect. Fact: I make mistakes sometimes all the time. Fact: It is scary utterly-pee-your-pants-terrifying to be vulnerable… to be seen.

Those are the facts. Here is the truth. “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but one of power and love and a sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7

Courage is knowing that fear exists. Courage is punching that fear square in the face and shouting, “NO! I know you are here to intimidate me, to try and keep me from ever stepping foot in that arena, from ever allowing myself to be seen. But the truth is, you have been REPLACED. You have been replaced with power (dýnamis – inherent power, power residing in a thing by virtue of its nature, or which a person or thing exerts and puts forth). You have been replaced with love (agapáō – to welcome, to entertain, to be fond of, to love dearly – i.e. to be SEEN). You have been replaced with a sound mind (sōphronéō – to be of sound mind, to be able to think correctly – i.e. unencumbered by fear). You are replaced with an inherent ability to overcome, to love fiercely, and to see you correctly for what you are:  you are done. The fact is, fear, you are a real and present enemy. The truth is, you do. not. control. me. anymore.”

2014 is the year of gates (I will explain in a later post, I promise!). It is a year of new doors opening up. There is an enemy at the gate, whose name is fear. Because I am loved greatly, I know who I am. I know I possess a power to stand against the fear: to defeat it. 2014 is about contending at the gates, and fighting our way in.

The fact is: fear is real. The truth is: you don’t have to let it win.

“The truth does not set you free. Knowing the truth, that is what sets you free.” – Emelio Sebastian

Be unafraid, you are loved greatly.



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